Typical Nairobi Talk

Posted: February 10, 2011 in Stuff I Like

A pal of mine tagged me on this note on FB…Enjoy!

Ay, Tom bana, w’sup. You’ve potead you guy, where’ve you been, ama it’s that nigga from that day who wekad you a *Gary Neville.. you kumbuka that day for rudge.

Hahaha ah you guy you’ve cracked. Kwanza you didn’t ambia me vibe for Naks? I skiad you guys rolled up in style yaani, I was being ambiwad by..nani..this mama what’s her name.. Kevo’s chick. Yeah, she was ambiaing me how everyone stopped and turned to look at who’s in the mots yaani, sijui the dere was drifting onto the field ama iz how?

Ahahaha driftin naetsin. You guy we were dropped there by a G5! Red leather seats champagne nininini, si you jua…

Haha you nigga the way you’ve ne’er even pandad a Daihatsu..

Walalalala a guy you haven’t even ambiad me like that. ‘S all good lakini

‘S all good in the hood nigga! 4 real lakini, you guys chafuad eh? You were with kina who?

Us guys rolled with kina Jamoe..

Which Jamoe, Jamoe G or rudbwoy..

Jamoe G. Then. Us guys were me, JT, kina Sam and then two mamaz who kujad with JT. And then the other mots was kina Ben and his chile and her pals.

Eh you guy Ben is still with that mama…? The way I had pangad that line with syke yaani..

Enyewe that mami is not a joke. Wah. That diab!

Eh those are the diabs you just jua she didn’t get it at Diabs-are-us…

Hahahaha ati Diabs-are-us. You guy waaaaat? hahaha

No, for real, si you’ve chekid those mamis when they pita.. you’re checkin them out then you just cheki anaa’ DISAPPOINTING diab you guy… you even go osha your machoz.

Ahahahahaha for real by the way you guy! I jua! Ati you even go osha your machoz. Walalalala.

Si now that’s how you jua if she got her diab at the local duka ama she got hers custom-made. You jua kwanza with a card ‘With love, God’.

Ahahahahahha! You guy I’ve sareed your storoz!

So what’s good lakini? Plan tonight? I’ve just gongad my ol’ man cheddar, I’ve semad the fees has been ongezwad. So what the dealie what the dealie yo?

I’m chilling for kina Shiko to fika. I think they were semaing we go Tamasha for jazz then we shuka Westie later. I don’ jua fo sho.

I’m ambiaing you Tamasha jazz is on point you guy.. have you ever gone? Ah, you jua kwanza the guy with that nini..whats it called again.. that long ass trumpet…..saxophone, yeah, that saxophone guy.. me I don’ jua what he fanyaz, but good music you guy… si you jua we can’t be skizaing Gucci Mane till when we’re 50.. we jus go tam tam.

Me I’m eaze. I’m down for whatever bora these mamiz Shiko is letaing are hot, ah, I’m sorted.

You’ll pita with like four of them kama kawaida..

You guy four will be the cube root of the real number yaani..

Ahahahaha. Sijui that Daihatsu of yours will vunjika tonight…

Eh, boss, ‘This my Daihatsu iss in very much palaver this evening’

Hahahaha si basi we check in the diggz and wait for kina Shiko.. you guy there’s some ‘aa baridi out here what were you even fanyaing outside..

Cigarette break. You want?

Nah I’m good. Ah, I have to chomoa my kicks over here?

No just ingiaa. They’ve chucked the carpet..

Ah nice.

By the way Tome..

Wassup. Eh I’m chekiing the diggz has been oshwad mpaka.

There’s a boti of Grant’s over there, you can just pop that shit open I’m kujaing.. this headrush is some serious shit you guy…

Ah, tha’s why you my nigga! Where, in the fridge? That’s that good shit bana.

Si you jua how we do up in this biatch. I’m kujaing.


Can i get a middle finger to the British? Yes? Middle finger to the British? A guy, colonization my dia

  1. walchi says:

    Lol..! why does this sound so much like that ken ouko guy..¿

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